The Spectral Agent is my first full-length novel and an experiment. We are independent creators, publishing chapter by chapter as a podcast and text. It’s designed to be heard. We’d love to receive your feedback so we can tell stories better.
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Text copyright © 2025 Jan Herrington
⚠️ Content Warning: Discussion of murder, paranormal activity
Last time on TSA
Viktor, Chai, Rue, Kira, and Finn settle into the cabin safe-house.
I shook my head. Finn flicked his lighter open, the flame momentarily lighting up his face in the shade of the trees. His eyes were frustrated. Fractured.
He smoked in silence for a while. The only sound was the faint crackle of the fire in the pit. Finally, he turned to me.
“Why did you kill him?”
A single question cracks the fragile calm, forcing Viktor to explain the impossible. Finn’s anger isn’t just about death—it’s about what’s left behind. The air tightens as proof replaces doubt. Some secrets, once shared, change everyone.
Chapter 20
“Why did you kill him?”
Finn’s question broke the silence.
I knew what he was talking about without even having to ask. “Self-defense,” I said. Not a threat, just a fact.
Finn’s grip on his cigarette twitched. “Yeah? That easy, huh?”
I turned my head slightly. “He was trying to kill me.”
Finn flinched. Then anger split him open.
“Oh, yeah?” he snapped, stepping toward me. “And you had to kill him, right? No other choice? Just boom, problem solved?”
I met his gaze head-on. “He would’ve put a bullet in my head if I hadn’t.”
Finn let out a sharp, bitter laugh. “Right, right.” He ran a hand through his hair, fingers shaking. “You know what’s fucking hilarious? I hated him.”
“I hated him, Viktor,” he hissed, then spoke venom with every uttered sentence. “Hated what he became. Hated what he did. Hated the way he looked at me like I was just some dumb kid who didn’t get it.”
I stayed silent, not knowing what to say.
Finn’s breath was coming faster now, his whole body tense. “You know, I didn’t think I’d care if he died.”
His hands clenched, cigarette nearly snapping between his fingers. “But now he’s gone, and I—” He stopped himself, jaw locked so tight it could crack teeth.
I exhaled slowly. “You’re mad at me.”
“No shit,” Finn snapped, spinning to face me. “I don’t even know if it’s at you, or at him, or at myself. But yeah, I’m more than a little mad.”
I nodded. “I get it.”
Finn scoffed. “No, you don’t.”
“I do, in some ways. More than you know.”
He stared at me, like he wasn’t sure if he wanted to try to believe me or throw a punch.
“I told myself I wouldn’t care if my father disappeared one day when I was a kid,” I confessed. “That if he drank himself to death, it wouldn’t matter to me.”
“But when it happened—” I began, dragging a hand down my face. “When it happened, I realized I was wrong. I wasn’t sad for him. I was sad for me. For what I lost, even if I didn’t want it in the first place.”
I tilted my head. “That’s what you’re feeling, isn’t it?”
Finn inhaled sharply, turning away again, shoulders rising and falling with uneven breaths. This time, his fingers dug into his scalp as he ran a hand through.
“Maybe,” he said under his breath.
Silence stretched between us. I didn’t push him. Didn’t tell him it would be okay, because I wasn’t sure it would be.
After a while, Finn let out a long, slow breath. “You really believe that? That it’s not about him but about me?”
“Yeah.”
Finn nodded absently. “That’s fucked up.”
I huffed a quiet laugh. “Yeah.”
Finn exhaled again. “I hate you,” he said, but there was no venom behind it.
I let out a small smile. For the first time since we got here, he looked at me like he actually saw me.
Not as the enemy, not as the guy who killed his brother—just me.
“Who was it?” Finn asked after a moment of silence.
“Chai Saetang—he jumped into Klaus, from me.” I touched the earring as I remembered that moment of emptiness.
“That idiot lock picker?”
“That idiot lock picker is with me right now.”
“Not cool, man!” Chai blurted, but only I could hear it.
Finn winced. “Oh... my bad. How does that work, anyway?”
I looked back to the cabin. “Now that’s something I should probably explain to the whole group.”
He shot me a skeptical glance but didn’t argue. He dropped his cigarette to the ground and snuffed it out. “Alright. Let’s go.”
✹✹✹
We gathered in the safe house’s living room. Finn leaned against the counter. Rue sat on one end of the couch, flipping her knife between her fingers. Kira sat stiffly at the other end, arms crossed.
I sighed. “Okay, here’s the deal.” I looked at Kira. “You’re gonna have to have an open mind for this one.”
They frowned. “That’s not reassuring.”
I reached for the earring, fingers brushing against the metal. Chai’s presence warmed me, telegraphing his recovery.
I breathed deep. “My friend and neighbor, Olivia, was murdered a few weeks ago. That’s what started me on this wild ghost chase.”
“Ghost?” Kira interjected.
“Yeah... I’ll catch you up on all the details later, but for now, this is the important part. When I touched her body, I felt a... presence. It took me a few days to realize it was Chai. A ghost—a soul that possessed me.”
“The tea guy?” Rue asked. She was looking off in the distance, but her focus snapped to me at that.
I stared at her and sighed. “Klaus, Finn’s brother—er, half-brother, was a gang member—an org member. He’s dead now. At least at the time, he should have been.”
I looked to Finn. He nodded.
“When Klaus died, his body was empty—a husk. And Chai’s soul—it jumped into it.”
Kira looked at me like they were a deer in headlights. “That’s not how death works.”
I shrugged. “I didn’t think so either.”
Kira raised an eyebrow. “And you’re sure Klaus didn’t just survive?”
I shook my head. “It wasn’t Klaus anymore. It was Chai. When a body has no soul left, I guess you can think of it like—like certain other souls can slip in. Chai was already dead, that’s how he was able to get there in the first place.”
“Chaus,” Rue muttered in recognition. I nodded at her, though she was looking down, deep in thought.
Kira paled. “So, he was a ghost? That just took over another person’s body?”
“Not exactly,” I corrected. “Klaus just drowned. He was braindead, but not dead-dead. Maybe it can only happen then. Chai said he couldn’t choose who he possessed. He was stuck in Olivia until I came along.”
At that, Kira started laughing obnoxiously. “What a great joke, Viktor. Now are you going to tell me the truth or what?”
I scowled. I knew they wouldn’t believe me. Suspicion’s in our nature.
Rue spoke up then. “Listen to him, Kira. It sounds accurate.”
Finn nodded in agreement.
“You really believe this?” Kira was incredulous.
“I’ve seen some weird shit,” was all Rue had to say in response.
Finn pressed further. “So what happened to Klaus—or Chai, whoever—at the meat-locker?”
“Chaus,” Rue said with conviction this time. Finn tilted his head as if it would help him hear better.
“Chaus died... again... at the meat-locker,” I fumbled. “Then Chai jumped back into me when I touched the body.”
Finn’s expression darkened. Then he let out a sharp laugh. “That guy won’t just leave you alone, will he?”
Kira stiffened. “You’re still possessed?”
“Yes,” I shrugged, already reaching for the earring.
“Viktor! Hey! Hey! Are you even listening?” Chai’s voice reverberated throughout my head.
“Prove it,” Kira demanded.
“VIKTOR!”
“What?!” I snapped.
The room fell to silence. Everyone stared at me.
Kira frowned. “Okay, so he is losing it again.”
I sighed, rubbing my temple. “I was responding to Chai.”
Finn tilted his head further. “How do you talk to the dead guy in your head?”
“The dead guy possessing me,” I corrected. “He’s really loud.”
Kira shook their head. “This is insane.”
I didn’t think Finn needed much more convincing, but he put on a show for Kira. “Alright, if Chai is really in there, then tell me something only he and I could know. Who led the mission he died on?”
Chai appeared as an apparition, standing next to the fridge. His semi-transparent form lightly flickered. “C’mon Vik, that’s too easy.” He told me the name.
“Vinny Krüger,” I relayed.
Finn stiffened before nodding. “Yep, good ol’ Vinz—” He coughed. “I mean, bad ol’ Vinzent.”
Kira looked nervous. “Could’ve been a lucky guess.”
I rolled my eyes. “Fine. Let’s try something else to prove it.”
I searched through the shelves and cabinets in the cabin, earning confused looks from the rest of the group. I finally found what I was looking for and handed it to Kira—a deck of cards.
“Hold up a card. Don’t show me.”
“What am I, a party clown?” Chai whined, then grinned. He loved this shit.
Kira hesitated, then pulled a card from the deck, gripping it between their fingers. I turned my head away for good measure.
Chai, standing behind them, was smug. “They’re holding a seven of spades.”
“Seven of spades,” I repeated to the group.
Kira’s mouth fell open as they revealed the card.
“Lucky guess?” I asked, amused.
They shuffled the deck before handing it to Finn. He pulled out a card. “Ace of hearts,” Chai said to me. When I turned around, I saw his ghost still looming over Finn’s shoulder.
“Ace of hearts.”
Finn’s expression changed for a moment, but he said nothing. He passed the deck to Rue. She tested me twice. Both times, I got it right.
By the end, Kira’s arms were crossed so tight they looked ready to snap. “Okay. So you’ve got a dead gang guy whispering in your ear. I guess that explains why I keep seeing a dark red aura around you?”
Rue blinked. “What?”
“I didn’t want to say anything because I thought I was losing my mind. But for weeks now, sometimes when I look at Viktor, I see this faint, red glow.”
“You told me at the diner, but I didn’t know you were seeing—” I stared at them. “Seeing Chai?”
“You didn’t tell me you were possessed,” they said, which was a fair point. “But I can’t see this Chai, only the aura.”
“You saw Klaus at the diner, did you see an aura around me or him?”
“No, you didn’t have one then, and he looked like a regular funeral director.”
Finn snorted and Chai’s laugh cut through the static.
“Chai was possessing Klaus’s husk then, so it makes sense you wouldn’t,” I said, not making any sense to myself.
“You both can see or sense ghosts.” Rue looked between me and Kira. “Sounds genetic.”
I felt my stomach twist. “Mother.” I swallowed hard. “She used to talk to things no one else could see.”
Rue frowned. “What do you mean?”
“Our mom would have entire conversations with people who weren’t there. She’d laugh, talk, even argue with them. Everyone thought she was crazy.”
“She wasn’t,” Kira murmured, looking down. “She probably had some kind of... um... ability too.”
“I grew up with a diagnosed psychosis, before all of this even happened,” I revealed. “I got it from mother. Maybe we both had hallucinations and abilities.”
Kira nodded slowly. “She was probably confused too. Maybe she couldn’t tell the difference between the real ghosts—and the fake ones.”
I closed my eyes, nodding, my head stuck in a rhythm. For years, I thought my mother was just sick. That whatever she saw wasn’t real. But what if part of it was? Maybe Mom had never been just crazy. Like how nobody listened to me, maybe nobody ever listened to her.
I opened my eyes and looked around the room. Kira had loosened up and was talking to Rue, who barely spoke back. Finn was flipping through the card deck and Chai was over his shoulder looking. Why? I have no idea why Chai does anything.
Why did Rue accept this ghost business so easily? She saw me kill Klaus, and now she knows it was possession. Finn saw Klaus become not-Klaus, so that’s enough, I guess. But still, they both have to know more.
“I’m hungry, what’s for dinner?” Finn said, pushing off the counter and walking to the fridge.
“Oh. I forgot about food.” Rue joined him in scrounging through the kitchen for something edible.
✹✹✹
The fire crackled, embers flickering in the cool night air. The sky had turned dusky purple with the last slivers of orange light stretching across the horizon. The scent of burning wood mixed with the smell of cheap hotdogs, charring over the open flame.
Finn and Rue had found them in the freezer, along with questionably old groceries. Kira had been horrified at the discovery, but Finn had shoved a skewer in their hand anyway, grinning like this was some kind of family camping trip.
I was sitting on the edge of my Adirondack chair, absentmindedly turning a hotdog over the fire. Rue lounged beside me, one leg stretched out, her eyes half-lidded as she stared into the flames. Finn sat across from us, smirking. Kira was eyeing their hotdog like it might kill them.
“This is disgusting,” Kira said, poking it with their finger.
“It’s protein,” Finn shot back. “Take it or leave it.”
“I’d rather starve.”
Finn snorted. “Your loss.”
Kira groaned but begrudgingly took a bite, then immediately gagged. “Oh my God, this tastes like it’s been in there for a century.”
“Possibly,” Rue remarked.
Finn chuckled, tossing a small stick into the fire. “Hey, if you don’t like it, Valentine’s Day is next week. Maybe your secret admirer will bring you something better.”
Kira looked disgusted. “Why the hell would you bring that up?”
Finn just grinned, and Kira buried their face in their hands, groaning.
I stayed quiet. My birthday will be next week. I hadn’t even thought about it. It wasn’t something I ever looked forward to.
Back in school, kids had always assumed I’d be excited. “Oh, you must love getting chocolates and extra gifts on your birthday, huh?” they’d say, expecting me to laugh along.
But I had never wanted chocolates. Or flowers. Or confessions written on pink paper. Because I was supposed to want them from girls.
I tensed, fingers tightening slightly around the skewer. No one noticed. I exhaled slowly and shoved the thought away.
I wasn’t celebrating my birthday this year. I wasn’t even acknowledging it. I was too busy anyway. It was just another day.
“Oh, it’s your birthday?” Chai exclaimed, too damn cheerful. “I’ve got to tell everyone!”
“Don’t you dare!” I said reflexively.
Everyone looked at me. Shit. “Uh... we’ve got to stop the Contagion. He best not dare mess with us.”
“Smooth, Viktor. Real smooth.” Chai smirked.
Finn stood. “You’re right. We will stop him for taking away the family I should have had.” Then he pointed his hotdog stick up and over the fire.
He looked ridiculous. Was he expecting everyone to jump in? No one else is that corn—
Kira bolted up, connecting with my eyes. “No one kidnaps me and gets away with it. And no one gets to kill my big brother before I do!” They popped their stick against Finn’s.
I am not doing that. I haven’t finished my hotdog and Rue would never do something so impuls—
“I can’t live my own life until he’s dead,” Rue stated, lifting out of her chair, cryptic as ever, then joined stick-swords with practiced motion.
All eyes turned to me expectantly. The fire crackled, sending embers into the night air. I slid the rest of the hotdog off my stick, popped it into my mouth, and chewed.
“Don’t be such a scaredy-cat, Viktor. You know we’re in.” Chai chided.
With a sigh, I stood. For both of us, I clanked my sword with the others, glancing at each of them.
“That settles it. Tomorrow we go on the attack.”
“Wooh! Spectral Squad! Let’s gooo!” Chai exclaimed to no one but me.
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